No, her only problem is that she's in L.A. She needs to relocate to a town of 20,000 or less and she'd fit right in. In a small town, your first DUI is practically a badge of honor. It's an f-in miracle almost to make it to 21 without some sort of ticket under your belt. Granted, its more like Sara Smith driving her dad's Hyundai into a parked car on 5th St., rather than Lindsay Lohan hopping a curb over on Sunset. But you know what? Same damn thing. Does Sara Smith go to rehab? No. She might get the keys taken away from her and be on probation for a few months, and the mom's around town will have someone new to focus their gossip on. That's it. End of story.
But the way the media is spinning this, Lindsay Lohan is some sort of national threat. The moral authority are marching on blogs and talk shows and burning Freaky Friday posters. Well, I have a little reminder for them. Remember everyone's good buddy, George W.? He's had a DUI. He drove his car into a ditch when he was 30 years old. The link below has a copy of his arrest record. Hell, Dick Cheney's had 2 DUI's! Not to mention the fact that its practically an open secret that George W. had a coke problem, and you can quickly see the similiarities with him and Lohan build up.
In other words, the girl is fine. Maybe Lindsay Lohan just needs to move to a small town with all the other kids who didn't go to college. She could still run for President under the standards set by George. In fact, she has ten more years of good partying in front of her in that case. As long as she discovers Jesus after that, her slate will be wiped clean and forgiven by all. Right?
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/bushdui1.html
http://www.cocaine.org/george-bush/index.html
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